Again

Lately, I’ve been thinking… is it ever okay to go back?  To attempt to try it – again?

They say that hindsight is 20-20.  We see things more clearly when we look back.. but then again, they also say that we look back through rose-colored glasses.  So, what’s the truth?  Honestly, I don’t know.  I think that our perspective changes.  When we’re in a rut, we think back to what we had and essentially, what we lost.  He was amazing… the sex was great…. he made me laugh… I loved every second that I spent with him.  But then there are those times when we meet another who just knocks our socks off.  Thinking back, we realize.. wait, the sex was actually boring.  He was boring.. and we fought.  All the time.  Maybe its circumstance that changes our perspectives.  Either way, the initial question still needs further exploration – is it okay to go back?

There’s no doubt that you miss each other.  You’ll go back and the make-up sex will be fantastic (whether or not it was great – or boring- before).  You’ll get on a love-high again and the honeymoon period will begin.  But inevitably, especially if you hadn’t had time to grow.. and if its the girl, too, who is pushing for the reconnection.. things will go back to once was.  And, do you want what the reality of “once was” for the rest of your life?  If things didn’t work out after 3 weeks.. 3 months.. 3 years.. how will they be after 33 years?  Relationships are a lot of work.  Both parties need to be fully invested.  In a day and age where the next partner is just a mouse click or a text away, its becoming increasingly difficult to find that level of commitment.  Nevertheless, its too soon to settle for what was.. because the reality of the situation is that it really wasn’t that much.  As rosy as things may seem now… it just wasn’t.  Move on.. make yourself sexy for the next one and not just for the next one.. for the you that will not take second best.